My Books Available on the web

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Author and Retired Deputy Warden

Sunday, September 27, 2015

Lying is good for you - so I am told



Lying Is Good For You

 

Executives today are told that lying is good for them and that it works well for those who get what they want or seek in life. Thus we are dealing with deceptive behaviors and the fact that the means justifies the end. Simply put, lying works well as it is often taken to be the truth as long as no one can contradict your version of the story, statement or comment.

Sometimes we lie to avoid punishment or admonishment for making a mistake, sometimes we lie to maintain a personal or professional relationship and try to please others at all costs. But honestly, most of all, we lie to please ourselves. The fact that we want to be more important than we really are drives us to tell lies that embellish our credentials, our reputation and our social or professional status.

Thus it’s fair to say, we deceive others to make ourselves appear and feel better. There are no exceptions to social status or professional positions of those who lie. On the average, a person tells three lies every ten minutes of a conversation. It is also fair to say that this number is way lower than actuality and is likely higher than that. In fact, we lie without hesitation and become dishonest in an addictive and automatic manner. Most of the time, we tell lies and not even aware we are lying.

Unfortunately, the best lies are those told when we don’t know we are lying as they are the hardest to detect when looking for deceptive behavior that includes body language or facial expressions. Because we don’t know we are lying, there are no nervous traits to follow or broadcast making the liar a credible source of information. Self-deceptive behavior is the handmaiden of deceit.

In today’s society, the truth has become more offensive than ever before. Honesty is no longer the best policy. Nobody wants to hear the truth any longer and if you are too honest, blunt, not politically correct or straight forward, you are considered an anti-social person with pathological baggage attached to your reputation.

People have been told that lying reaps psychological benefits for them. It is said that people who lie are less depressive in their moods, more energized and more willing to accept more responsibilities. The less honest you are, the more benefits your sow socially and professionally. Whether intentional or pathological, a good liar can easily fool people and harvest more than others, making me think that sooner or later, karma will play into that part of your life as well.

Therefore, when all is said and told, we live with the assumption that people are telling the truth when in fact they are lying. Perhaps this is motivated by the fact we hear what we want to hear and encourage others to accept it true or not. Accepting a lie prevents digging for the real truth. It establishes a false sense of legitimacy and once heard we are motivated to let sleeping dogs lie.

Thus we accept lying as a fact of life, we even changed the words into a code or slang term to determine its value is worth as much, if not more than honesty is today. One is to say, that being politically correct, tactful, possessed with social graces or diplomacy is a gift taught at a very early age and gets better as they grow older.

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